It's a fact of life every holiday season: Holiday cards pour in from friends and family that show them with their adorable kids, partners and pets. But cards from someone who's not in a long-term relationship are much rarer. Why?
Ashley Stone, of Washington, D.C., decided a few years ago that her relationship status shouldn't stop her from sending a holiday card herself. She now sends holiday cards every year, including a solo shot. Here she writes in her own words how she empowered herself to embrace the tradition.
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I vividly remember the kitchen table of my childhood stacked with my family's holiday cards, rolls of stamps, address labels and my mom’s address book.
As a child, I loved checking the mailbox and opening the cards.
As an adult, I saw sending Christmas cards as a rite of passage.
I started sending cards after college as a way to stay in touch with friends and family.
Fast forward a few years later and Christmas cards from my friends became Christmas cards from my friends’ families; showcasing a recent engagement, wedding or birth announcement. The cards featured photos of the happy couple, a blushing bride, kids and memories they made throughout the year.
I was also making happy memories throughout the year, but it didn’t seem appropriate for me to share this through just a picture of myself.
I had a serious boyfriend, but I was confident that if I suggested we send joint Christmas cards, that would be the last time we talked. So I continued to send my store-bought ones.
As time went on, the stack of cards from single friends were getting smaller and those that were now married and had never sent holiday cards before were now sending them. I didn’t have what society would deem as a rite-of-passage announcement, but I was happy, established and traveling the world.
Then came my epiphany. There did not have to be two people, or kids or a pet to make a holiday card complete
But, what was I going to do, spend money on personalized cards showcasing myself? No. So I kept sending generic cards.
Then came my epiphany. There did not have to be two people, or kids or a pet to make a holiday card complete.
It was perfect with just me.
I was traveling the world and having fun on my own. Who cares that it wasn’t alongside a fiancé or husband, and why wouldn’t I not want to share my adventures of my trips each year? It was an important part of my life and I had a right to share it too.
I am an independent woman, doing amazing things and going to incredible places. I had the right and wanted to share that with family and friends too.
I started personalizing my cards and ordered them to feature a photo of myself in a place I’d traveled that year. Friends that I traveled with knew that if we were sightseeing somewhere with a beautiful background, a photoshoot would ensue to ensure I had the perfect picture to feature on my card.
When I first sent my Christmas cards only featuring myself, my friends gave me a hard time. But it didn’t deter me and now I receive texts from friends inquiring where I am traveling and what my card will feature that year.
I look forward to creating my card -- choosing the perfect background and lettering. And, of course, the perfect picture of me.
There’s still something magic about Christmas cards. In a world where we are constantly texting, uploading, liking and Instagraming, there's something to be said for sending -- and receiving! -- an actual card in the mail.
Sending cards allows me to stay in touch with the wonderful people in my life, from co-workers who have moved away to family members whose distance only allows us to see each other at large family gatherings.
I love that these holiday cards spur conversations and, am hopeful they spark joy in the people I send them too. The cards also serve as a collection of my travels and the places I’ve been, something tangible I will have to look back at and see all that I’ve done.
It is sending and receiving love and joy, which is really what this season is all about.
