"No thanks, we don't need anything. We're fine."
It's the reply text that new mamas know all-too well. Friends and fam are constantly dropping in to meet the babe, and while you're getting the occasional tray of lasagna weeks after giving birth, there's so much more that's needed emotionally and physically.
Baby showers are appreciated, so why not invest in helping moms during their first six-to-eight weeks postpartum?
"Moms forget about themselves after they have the baby...I think it's really those baby blues," said Jenna Greenspoon, co-owner of savvysassymoms.com. "You feel like you're supposed to go on and smile and say, 'sure, come over and see my baby.' Nobody ever asks about the mom--once you have the baby, you kind of get forgotten about.
"A postpartum party is to focus on mom and making her feel special," she added.
Whether you're shamelessly throwing one for yourself or want to pitch in for a pregnant pal, here are tips for planning an epic postpartum party that'll celebrate her (or you) in the ways she needs it most.
Set up a guest list with tentative visiting hours
If you're the one hosting the two-month-long soiree, reach out to potential visitors and let them know what you truly need (food, cleaning, babysitting, etc.) over the next few weeks of recovery. If you're the party-planning friend, consult the new mom on who her network of people are that she looks to for mental support.
Then, explain to guests that the next few weeks are for celebrating mom.
But remember to set your boundaries, says Greenspoon, who is also a mom of two.
"The most important thing for new moms to know is it's OK to say no," Greenspoon told "Good Morning America." "This way you are in control rather than everyone ringing your door bell."
If you're setting up a digital calendar where loved ones can sign up, establish mealtime hours as time slots so guests can bring dishes.
In addition Greenspoon suggests offering tentative visiting hours that revolve around baby's feeding times. But be sure to leave wiggle room in case, well, life happens.
It's easy to forget about one's self when caring for a bundle of love. Your buds and relatives can organize homemade meal-giving, but why not elevate them a bit?
"Put together a Friday night dinner," Greenspoon said. "A friend came over [for me] with a whole dinnner and she sort of took it to the next level."
Print a menu out spotlighting your BFF's baby pic. Then, schedule a girlfriends night with a bottle of wine and have everyone prepare a course.
"[Mom] can entertain and let me do all the work," Greenspoon explains.
To the bestie in charge: recruit the girls to assemble a postpartum kit for mom. Some suggestions include witch hazel pads, and comfy clothes to take the pressure off of getting back into pre-baby threads.
"Make mom feel better in a fun way by giving a squeeze bottle, a blow up donut--take away the stigma of the things that we're not supposed to talk about like how she can't sit on a hard chair," Greenspoon said. "Make it funny so she doesn't feel isolated."
If you're not into DIY, we love the new mom survival kit from the Etsy shop, White Confetti Box. Inside is a "Haute Mama" silk sleep mask, a milk bath soak, candle, "Tired as a Mother" tumbler and more.
Ask a new mommy if you can play maid for an hour, then chances are she'll turn you down.
Instead, arrive at an acceptable hour with the squad donning aprons. Each of you tackle a small, but helpful task like emptying the dishwasher or doing a laundry load of bibs and burp clothes.
"Have one person in charge who's sitting her down and not allowing her to stop you," Greenspoon says.
Another option she won't decline is a gift card for a cleaning service.
